For those of you in the know, Kambo is a traditional amazonian medicine where venom of the greater green monkey frog is applied to burn marks on the skin. The monkey frog has no known natural predators and I can tell you first hand why this is.
Able, my able shaman arrived and we prepared the front balcony for the torture I was about to endure. I had been through my warrior initiation ritual 2 days prior, however, I really had no idea what I had signed up for. During my first ceremony we did the drill. Purge!!!!
My second ceremony was a bit later in the morning, starting at 11 and the sun was generously starting to heat things up. Able prepared the access points on my ankle and over my primary chakra. To accomplish this task a vine is lit a blaze and the smoldering charcoal is punked into the flesh leaving a small round hole in the skin. It is not pleasant but far less obnoxious than a bee sting. However it is a voluntary act of masochism and you only have self doubt, yourself and ultimately the shaman to blame.
After the skin was cleaned I received a dose of rape, a powdered mixture of tobacco, various plant roots and ash blown into your sinuses. Immediately my head began to float and I was reminded to focus on my breathing. Throughout the ritual and throughout life I have found that breathing is rather important. I sat there eyes closed meditating on where I needed the medicine I was about to receive to do its work. I focused my energy on my ankle and on my connection back to the life force of our earth.
Shortly after the balls of poison frog venom were applied I began to feel a nausea coming over me. This was a very different feeling to the initiation ritual were I began vomiting black liquid immediately upon application. In my initiation ritual I could feel the black cloud of death spinning its way through every cell in my body. I could clearly see that at some point in the threads of time the creature we all crawled out of had tried to take a bite out of the Monkey Frog and learned a very important lesson on how to process the poison. All those who failed died. Every cell in your body begins to work in a rhythmic harmony to remove this toxin and and you can feel the detachment between the consciousness and the body where it has chosen to reside. Any cell that might not serve a purpose or can’t quite keep up gets tossed out. The resulting tree of evolution brought me to the destination where I am sitting on my balcony heaving liters of black death into a bucket I am holding tightly in my hands. I felt it this blue plastic vessel was indeed my friend.
To endure this poison it is critical that you over hydrate immediately prior to the ceremony. I would have consumed 4 liters of water and purged 6. Some might consider this a truly amazing biological feat.
The difference between the first and second round was the additional applications of venom over the root chakra. I had felt so good the day in-between I had decided to paint my roof in the sun. I may have been slightly dehydrated at a cellular level. I recommend going into these rituals feeling strong and feeling well.
As the venom started to set in during my second ceremony my nausea was evolving as was I. I felt the transformation of becoming the frog, yet my molecules would not let go and the conflict was seen in violent act of vomit. Bright yellow this time which was a distinct change. However, as I continued to endure the unacceptable feeling of utter sickness that you want nothing more than to end, I had run out of water in my system. I was now dry heaving and with each heave I began to loose feeling in my face. My lips were first as they began to swell then my eyes. I was shape shifting into a frog.
Panic would be bad at this stage, potentially disastrous. Breathing systematically and staying calm are so key to survival that I do wonder why we were ever preprogramed with a fight or flight response when in those moment staying critical in our thinking is in our best interest of survival. We no longer have the dinosaurs to keep us in check, so living logical in the moment might now be a better option than hysteria or comfort consumption at all times.
I closed my eyes and focused on my breathing and the images that came through my field of view. Penguins, feeding a baby penguin and an ice shelf sliding in. Moments of global death and destruction. In those breaths I was an emperor penguin. When a colony of life is whipped out in an instant there is a scar and beauty that you can feel if you know how. I believe we are organic crystals that vibrate and that keeps us here in the moment, yet we also have the capability of being so much more. If we vibrate in harmony with the life force of the earth we can communicate with life up and down through the trees. We do this through our feelings and they are the only thing you will ever truly own.
Back in the moment as the nausea subsided, about 45 minuets after entering into hell, I was feeling a bit emotional unsettled but physically well. My throat still hurt and my face was still a bit swollen but not as dramatic as in the middle of it all. The rest of the day was followed with a lot of napping which went fairly well. in between a bit of depression and questioning of personal security on all levels ran through my head. Through the night and into the next day these feeling settled down much like sediment in the sea. Any disruptive event could dredge up bad feelings, however that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t go sailing through it.
Chronic pain in my ankle is noticeable better, not perfect, but I don’t expect it ever will be. Western medicine would have prescribed a pill for an ill until I would be shooting heroin in a back ally somewhere. The problem with treating chronic pain with a crutch is that eventually you tend to wear them out. When just walking two blocks to the store becomes an ordeal you start looking for ways out. I am 4 days in and with kambo it feels ok, it is not a miracle cure but the pain has gone away. I have my final ceremony tomorrow. I don’t know if my body is up to the task, however I will dredge on. So many friends have asked why I would endure such torture. The answer is pain avoidance and looking for new /old ways to cope. Western medicine hasn’t offered up any acceptable and viable solutions so why not try a things out? There is a world of solutions on this earth that are all being cut down. I feel sorry for the future i continue to see evolving. I feel sorry for the being I am connected to that is being destroyed and cut down. We don’t own this planet it owns us and if we don’t watch our step it will very easily kick us all off.
Installment #3
I never managed to finish writing about my first previous Kambo experiences prior to arriving at my third ceremony. Able my Kambo guide suggested we attempt three ceremonies spaced a day apart. I am writing to you from Saturday night, a clear indication I made through alive. Despite my melodrama people have perished from this toxin. If it is to happen, it most likely will occur during your initial session, or if you are truly a masochist and enjoy enduing the toxin day after day for far too long. I have to confess I was slightly concerned. Session two redefined a reference for intense outlined in my personal log of life experiences.
During my off day I felt fine, but made sure I took things a bit slower. I didn’t finish everything I could manage to do. I wonder how long the person lived who came up with the saying don’t put off till tomorrow what you can do today. If we all satisfied in the accomplishments our bodies are capable of achieving in a day maybe we wouldn’t be dry heaving on the floor with our face the size of a melon. Yes I know my ills were self inflicted yet, a cleans reveals so much, but almost of society’s ills are self inflicted as well. We all want more even if it means working to get it might kill us. It’s much better if we can figure out ways to get other people to do our work for us. In this dimension we live in at times we have to play all rolls in life to get by.
As the rape settled in I focused on my connection to the life force of the earth and surrendered. I let go of ego and with my consciousness tried as I might to tap into the life force that is living earth and in my sentient ability to feel we became one.
As the toxic balls of venom were applied I drank more water and focused on my breathing and the tree in my yard. As my heart rate began to spike and my head pounded I reached for my blue plastic friend. I was expecting this to be the beginning, however, with in 10 minuets of purge, all that came out was clear water. My body had learned to process the toxin, or anything thing it potentially would kill had already died.
In my mind it reminded me of a scene from Dune, where Paul Atradies processed the spice and it reminded me of a quote from this book by Frank Herbert
“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”
Extinction and the great die off has been my fear. The evidence is indisputable that we are clearly in a phase of great die off. In the last 100 years, all we have lost more that 70% of non human life on the planet. This time we are the bacteria producing gasses that are disrupting the balance of life. We are a part of nature and if we want to remain on this planet we have to evolve and it can go in an infinite number of ways.
To think that 7.4 billion humans is not having an impact on every part of this planet is irresponsibly stupidity. What ever happens and how fast it happens doesn’t really matter any more than you or I do. Kambo clearly showed me that we have a choice, follow the path through fear and connect with the natural world. Do what I can to conserve and stop injustice against nature in the name of human greed. Start in my own yard. Start with the soil, fixing what was lost. I realize it is very likely we will go the way of the penguins who died last week. With 7.4 billion people it is possible this change could even come on rather suddenly we will see.